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Is this thing…a garbage can?
Ok, these evil clowns are sort of getting to me (and we have a lot more territory to cover before Halloween) so let’s take a little breather with some clown mascots! Now this brings us to a classic problem which lies at the heart of the uneasy love/fear/contempt relationship we have with clowns. Clowns wear make-up, prosthetics and masks (assuming they aren’t just a picture of a crazy face–like some of these characters). These exaggerated new features blur or occlude the very subtle facial muscles which we primates are laser-focused on in order that we can tell if a grinning stranger is a new ally or a murderous lunatic. If the orbicularis oris is occluded with paint–or cast in imperishable plastic!–is hard to tell if a clown is evil or wretched or…happy, I guess.
Clarabell the Clown was Howdy Doody’s mute partner and the definitive TV clown of the generation before mine
All of this is a long way of introducing some old familiar clown mascots while asking that you examine them with a fresh eye. When seen anew, some of these guys look a lot more disturbing then I recall–not to mention the fact that they are almost all trying to sell greasy sugary food, weird costumes, or dangerous carnival rides! You can really see how people become afraid of clowns…or capitalism. But don’t worry, this is a safe space and this big-shoed saunter down memory lane is all in good fun.
Ronald McDonald was the face of McDonalds when I was growing up, and he can still be found around the 36,000 McDonald’s restaurants worlwide…but I feel like they have been moving him towards a more ceremonial role and shilling deep-fried fast food by other means
Is Jack Box of Jack in the Box even technically a clown?
Oh wow! It’s Osaka’s Famous Clown Mascot, Kuidaore Taro!
Bozo was a figure from the first days of television–he was franchised but each station had their own version!
Dammit, Mr. Softee, get out of here, you are clearly an ice-cream.
The Grinning Face of Steeplechase is still an emblem of Coney Island
GET. KRINKLES. AWAY. NOW.
Emmett Kelly as famous depression-era clown, Weary Willie
I just don’t know…
The Trademark Jester of Mardi Gras!
To say nothing of vintage pinball!
The Vintage Fanta Jester
Well that was a refreshing break, I guess. It does illustrate the point that clowns–even the most anodyne ones meant to sell pop and hamburgers–are pretty unknowable and stand right in the middle of the uncanny valley. Yet they are inexpensive corporate spokespeople and they have a way of hanging on in our memories, if only for nostalgia’s sake.
OMG! It’s Sweet Tooth from “Twisted Metal”! Did we ever unlock him? Robbie? Nick? Anybody?
ferrebeekeeper 